It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
