I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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