Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
