i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
