so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize