I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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