That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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