I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize