I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
