I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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