$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize