Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize