Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
