I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
