He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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