No stitches, just platelets and will power
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Just invented taco cereal.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
