how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
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