He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
