Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
