check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
