I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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