Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
it glows. i had to have it.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
