I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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