i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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