my room smells like sperm. sweet.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
