I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
