Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
