You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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