is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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