would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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