i wish there were pregnant emoticons
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
