So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
