It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
