By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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