I wanna bring you to show and tell
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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