Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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