GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
