Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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