So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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