Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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