Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
