Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
