Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
