I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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