We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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