He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
