I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
