Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
It's shark week go big or go home
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
