had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
