so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You pole danced in your parka.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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