dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
