This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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